why do the best things happen in the little squares in every parks gag reel?
"[Amy Poehler] is the queen goddess of the universe. She has mystical powers, sexual powers, and she’s always the funniest person in the room. Sometimes I feel like her mother and sometimes I feel like I birthed her and sometimes I feel like she birthed me. And sometimes I want to make out with her."
"It’s super weird because it’s the first one that I’ve done where the people in the audience are also entertainers. Everything else, even if I bombed, I’d still be funnier than most of the people there. That part of it is terrifying. Also, I know a lot of these people from television, but I also know a lot of them personally. So, here’s the thing: If I see an actor that I know from television respond to one of my jokes, I won’t know what that face means, but if I catch Poehler – I know all of Poehler’s faces, so I’ll be able to read her. But, it’s exciting. I never considered turning it down."
SO I ACTUALLY DID THIS A FEW MONTHS AGO AND I DIDNT EVEN THINK THEY LOOKED AT THIS SORT OF THING SO BY THE TIME THE DELIVERY MAN CAME I HAD FORGOTTEN THAT I WROTE THAT AND THE GUY WAS REALLY CUTE. WHEN I OPENED THE DOOR HE WAS SUPER FLUSTERED AND DROPPED HIS PEN, THE BAG HOLDING THE PIZZA AND THE RECEIPTS. THEN after i signed the receipt and he was getting ready to leAVEEEE HE GOES “So… umm… did you actually put that?” and i was like “put what?” and he goes “… to.. um… tell you.. um that you’re pretty” omg it hit me that this was why he was all nervous and i started cracking up omfg then he told me that i was pretty.
i did this once but when the guy came to the door I sent my friend Martin to get the pizza and I heard muffled laughter and then Martin came back into the room with the pizza and whispered “he told me I was pretty”
(Source: kallesdemos, via not-very-important-person)